We all meet all sorts during the course of time, and believe me, I’ve often had to deal with the weirdest of the lot, some of whom were unfortunately pretty close to home. But today I want to talk of one particular breed of people. A breed that I believe are the lowest and the sickest of them all. Stalkers.
They are spineless cowards who feed off the fear they create in the victims they obsess over.
Anonymous letters, mails, calls, even gifts. Threats. These are just some of the ways they operate. And in cases of extreme manifestation stalkers would even approach the victim directly and shamelessly.
Apparently there are various categories of stalkers. There's the stalker who continues to cling on to a previous partner and refuses to accept that the relationship is over. Some stalkers fantasise that another individual is in love with them, and in most cases the latter would be totally ignorant of the obsession, this is often the case of celebrities who're stalked. Other stalkers drown in envy and resent the victim's relationships with others, in such cases, those directly involved with the victim may indirectly turn out to be victims themselves, of the stalker's rage.
Now why am I so obsessed about this?
Well, I want to share an experience that I have been forced to endure sporadically for over ten years.
You're probably thinking that I'm being stalked by a secret admirer, maybe I get anonymous gifts and flowers? Well I wish!!
First of all, my stalker is a woman. Yes. A woman. And I have chosen to share this on my blog because I know she stalks me online as well and I want her to know that I have had enough of her craziness.
I want her to know that I actually feel rather sorry for her but that I no longer have any more patience.
I want her to know that I know exactly who she is. I know who her husband is, who her family is. I know where she lives.
I want her to know that I have compiled an entire dossier of every single letter, mail etc she had the stupidity to send to me over the years.
And I want to make it very clear to her that I have enough evidence against her.
Yes evidence. Because stalking in India is a criminal and punishable offence.
And now, let me rewind and start at the beginning.
She latched onto me almost ten years ago. In the beginning I was an indirect victim, the true object of her obsession was a friend of mine. Gradually I became the main target. My crime? My friendship.
In the beginning she would send anonymous mails, at least she thought they were anonymous because she was stupid enough to think that if she'd sent them from different email addresses I wouldn't be able to figure out who she is.
Each email was traced back to her residential address in Vizag.
She then resorted to calling me, but perhaps because my instincts were on high alert at the time, I could identify her and was on immediate guard.
Her attacks are sporadic, almost periodic. Once a mail or a letter arrived, it would be immediately followed up with one or two more, and then there would be a sudden and absolute silence. Sometimes she would disappear for years, and gradually I would ease up, hoping she was finally done with me until suddenly out of the blue she would start the attack again.
I don't deny that initially she would accomplish what apparently is the motive of every stalker - to terrorise me with such repeated attacks. Because, in the beginning, every time I received a mail or a letter from her I would feel violently violated.
Her language is crass. The sentences clash madly. Each letter carries filthy references to innocent friends, family and colleagues of mine. Each letter is a senseless mess of ugly abuse hurled with such intense hatred and anger that I have often wondered how someone could have so much negativity within them and still survive. Especially someone who had never met me. Each letter proves that she is so severely obsessed with my existence that she stalks me on every possible channel and platform. Every and any presence of mine, online or offline, is minutely scrutinised to such an extent that she's even researched everyone who's associated with me, be it closely or not. She is aware of every picture or post of mine or tagged to me.
Things hit a horrible high, when, around 3 years ago I was sitting at an airport waiting for a flight home and this strange woman approached me. She seemed almost gleeful to have met me and threw several names of people I knew. Being me, I was polite and assumed she was who she claimed to be, a freelance writer, until the conversation started to turn weird. And that was when it struck me. This was that woman. I gave her a clear hint that I had recognised her, she left immediately and that was the last I had heard of her. Until a couple of weeks back. I guess I should have known that if she could succumb to the extreme manifestation of her madness and approach me directly and confidently then she was definitely not going to stop.
The most recent attack was an anonymous letter sent to my office just a few weeks back. This time however, I felt no fear. I felt no anger either. I just felt very sorry for a very very sick individual.
As I read it I realised that she's just a pathetic deranged coward, who is obviously drowning in her mad psychotic fantasies.
She obviously has no idea that there's no point not putting a name to her letters and mails to me, because it can easily and clearly be proved that she's the author of each one. Yes. Today there are language experts who can vouch in courts of law and their testimonies are considered admissible.
You see, I've been doing my research.
I've understood that stalkers have innumerable mental disorders, they are driven by anger, obsession, envy and frustration. Their crazed minds cook up all sorts of madness that justifies their malicious actions in their heads. And in my case, I have also found out that her madness was actually encouraged even more by a couple of individuals who had their own selfish reasons to persecute me.
Anyway, it seems female stalkers are the worst of the sick lot. Most cases show that they can continue to stalk for years and are very difficult to shake off. Well, that's definitely the case in my story.
But I have chosen to take a purposeful turn in the story she's trying to create for me.
So this is my message - I am not afraid of you. I do not give a damn about you. I have lived my life on my terms and I will continue to live my life on my terms. You and whatever you think or do has absolutely no significance to me. No matter what you try you are powerless and worthless to me. I have had enough of you. So I choose to pray for you. I choose to pray for your poor trapped tormented soul. So every time you experience any joy or happiness in your life you will know that that's because I have been praying for you. If you still choose to approach or attack me, directly or indirectly, then I will report you, I will have a case filed against you, I will ensure that you are legally punished for the crimes committed against me. I will inform your family and I will see to it that you are given the help that you obviously and desperately need.
You do not know me. I am far beyond anything you could possibly imagine me to be. I am proud and happy to be me and I enjoy a great peace of mind because I know that whatever you do I will always be happy that I am me.
They are spineless cowards who feed off the fear they create in the victims they obsess over.
Anonymous letters, mails, calls, even gifts. Threats. These are just some of the ways they operate. And in cases of extreme manifestation stalkers would even approach the victim directly and shamelessly.
Apparently there are various categories of stalkers. There's the stalker who continues to cling on to a previous partner and refuses to accept that the relationship is over. Some stalkers fantasise that another individual is in love with them, and in most cases the latter would be totally ignorant of the obsession, this is often the case of celebrities who're stalked. Other stalkers drown in envy and resent the victim's relationships with others, in such cases, those directly involved with the victim may indirectly turn out to be victims themselves, of the stalker's rage.
Now why am I so obsessed about this?
Well, I want to share an experience that I have been forced to endure sporadically for over ten years.
You're probably thinking that I'm being stalked by a secret admirer, maybe I get anonymous gifts and flowers? Well I wish!!
First of all, my stalker is a woman. Yes. A woman. And I have chosen to share this on my blog because I know she stalks me online as well and I want her to know that I have had enough of her craziness.
I want her to know that I actually feel rather sorry for her but that I no longer have any more patience.
I want her to know that I know exactly who she is. I know who her husband is, who her family is. I know where she lives.
I want her to know that I have compiled an entire dossier of every single letter, mail etc she had the stupidity to send to me over the years.
And I want to make it very clear to her that I have enough evidence against her.
Yes evidence. Because stalking in India is a criminal and punishable offence.
And now, let me rewind and start at the beginning.
She latched onto me almost ten years ago. In the beginning I was an indirect victim, the true object of her obsession was a friend of mine. Gradually I became the main target. My crime? My friendship.
In the beginning she would send anonymous mails, at least she thought they were anonymous because she was stupid enough to think that if she'd sent them from different email addresses I wouldn't be able to figure out who she is.
Each email was traced back to her residential address in Vizag.
She then resorted to calling me, but perhaps because my instincts were on high alert at the time, I could identify her and was on immediate guard.
Her attacks are sporadic, almost periodic. Once a mail or a letter arrived, it would be immediately followed up with one or two more, and then there would be a sudden and absolute silence. Sometimes she would disappear for years, and gradually I would ease up, hoping she was finally done with me until suddenly out of the blue she would start the attack again.
I don't deny that initially she would accomplish what apparently is the motive of every stalker - to terrorise me with such repeated attacks. Because, in the beginning, every time I received a mail or a letter from her I would feel violently violated.
Her language is crass. The sentences clash madly. Each letter carries filthy references to innocent friends, family and colleagues of mine. Each letter is a senseless mess of ugly abuse hurled with such intense hatred and anger that I have often wondered how someone could have so much negativity within them and still survive. Especially someone who had never met me. Each letter proves that she is so severely obsessed with my existence that she stalks me on every possible channel and platform. Every and any presence of mine, online or offline, is minutely scrutinised to such an extent that she's even researched everyone who's associated with me, be it closely or not. She is aware of every picture or post of mine or tagged to me.
Things hit a horrible high, when, around 3 years ago I was sitting at an airport waiting for a flight home and this strange woman approached me. She seemed almost gleeful to have met me and threw several names of people I knew. Being me, I was polite and assumed she was who she claimed to be, a freelance writer, until the conversation started to turn weird. And that was when it struck me. This was that woman. I gave her a clear hint that I had recognised her, she left immediately and that was the last I had heard of her. Until a couple of weeks back. I guess I should have known that if she could succumb to the extreme manifestation of her madness and approach me directly and confidently then she was definitely not going to stop.
The most recent attack was an anonymous letter sent to my office just a few weeks back. This time however, I felt no fear. I felt no anger either. I just felt very sorry for a very very sick individual.
As I read it I realised that she's just a pathetic deranged coward, who is obviously drowning in her mad psychotic fantasies.
She obviously has no idea that there's no point not putting a name to her letters and mails to me, because it can easily and clearly be proved that she's the author of each one. Yes. Today there are language experts who can vouch in courts of law and their testimonies are considered admissible.
You see, I've been doing my research.
I've understood that stalkers have innumerable mental disorders, they are driven by anger, obsession, envy and frustration. Their crazed minds cook up all sorts of madness that justifies their malicious actions in their heads. And in my case, I have also found out that her madness was actually encouraged even more by a couple of individuals who had their own selfish reasons to persecute me.
Anyway, it seems female stalkers are the worst of the sick lot. Most cases show that they can continue to stalk for years and are very difficult to shake off. Well, that's definitely the case in my story.
But I have chosen to take a purposeful turn in the story she's trying to create for me.
So this is my message - I am not afraid of you. I do not give a damn about you. I have lived my life on my terms and I will continue to live my life on my terms. You and whatever you think or do has absolutely no significance to me. No matter what you try you are powerless and worthless to me. I have had enough of you. So I choose to pray for you. I choose to pray for your poor trapped tormented soul. So every time you experience any joy or happiness in your life you will know that that's because I have been praying for you. If you still choose to approach or attack me, directly or indirectly, then I will report you, I will have a case filed against you, I will ensure that you are legally punished for the crimes committed against me. I will inform your family and I will see to it that you are given the help that you obviously and desperately need.
You do not know me. I am far beyond anything you could possibly imagine me to be. I am proud and happy to be me and I enjoy a great peace of mind because I know that whatever you do I will always be happy that I am me.
